17 – Braga shot at Zaluska who made a bit of a meal of it.

20 – Ref a whistle happy cock.

24 – Ref is a whistle happy cock and so is his linesman. Penalty given for the softest of handbaws. 1-0 to them.

25 – From the kick off we give them the ball, they break away and almost make it two!

40 – Two average teams. Nope, one average and one crap.

41 – Hooiveld booked following a Lovenkrandsesque dive from Braga forward.

44 – The most passes Celtic have strung together is four!

45 – Celtic look like a team who have never played together which erm……is what we are!

HT – Dire fare.

47 – Big punt from the Celtic defence. Where is plan b or plan c?

49 – Woo hoo 5 passes….and then Mulgrew passes it straight out the park!

50 - Now Ki passes it straight out the park!

51 – Maloney’s turn to….ach you’ve guessed it. Lenny doing his nut!

52 – Sclaff at goal from Cesar that a 3 year old girl would have been disappointed in. Zaluska dives dramatically at it for some unknown and rather strange reason.

58 – Loovens booked for throwing his side-shed into opponents face.

60 - Braga really are pish but wait they are beating us 1-0 so what does that makes us….oh you know the rest.

62 – Great run by Du-Ri. He passes to Big Jessie who stops the move and looses all momentum only for Juarez and Mulgrew to mess up!

65 – Celtic team now showing a lot more urgency by breaking into a trot.

67 – 10 passes from Celtic. Barca look out!

71 – A sub!! Murphy on for Maloney and we go two up front! Any of the midfielders could have been taken off.

72 – An attack…….what’s going on? Corner to Celtic

74 – Hooiveld makes big mad mental lunge and is lucky Braga player didn’t go down or it would have been a certain red card.

76 – Corner to Braga. Loovens standing picking his nose and Elderson nips in for softest of goals. Quite pathetic.

78 – 40 yard punt from Mulgrew and 40 yard header from Murphy goes 40 yards wide. It’s about as close as we’ve come.

79 – Jessie kicks it straight out the Park. Get a haircut and a heart ya big puff.

80 – Forrest on. Gawn son play like Gump and make yirsel a hero,

81 – Mulgrew boots the ball away aimlessly for the 20^th time tonight.

82 – Make that 21.

87 – Another aimless punt from Loovens.

88 – 3-0. At first glance looks like an amazing free kick on second viewing how the hell did he beat the keeper from 35 yards when the ball was nowhere near the corner of the net? Appalling goalkeeping.

89 – Punt from Hooiveld out the park. We’d be European Champions at that.

92 – Braga kick ball out of play as their player is down. Murphy punts it back from 50 yards and their keeper touches it over the bar. Bloody unsporting Celtic but we cannot complain as it means we managed to get one shot on target Hurrah!

93 – Full time. Embarrassing.

94 – Small group of Celtic supporters giving team and coaches pelters and rightly so.

95 – That was as dire a performance as I can recollect as we created absolutely nothing and I mean nothing against a decidedly ordinary team. No McGeady and Hinkel shows money means more to the suits than getting a good run in Europe and a bunch of signings so late in the day barely gave the players an opportunity to be on first name terms. Even so, the performance was directionless and totally embarrassing. If McGeady and Hinkel are to go the money brought in better all be spent on quality or the Celtic board should be chased out of Celtic Park.